"I may not have gone where I intended to go, but i think I have ended up where I needed to be."
-Douglas Adams

Saturday, 6 October 2012

i believe

i believe

i believe that you are here
your essence strong and supportive
our seperation only a reality
in this physical world of mine

i believe that in the place of no time
we exist together, lost in the light
yet still i weep and forget to breathe
in the missing of your touch

i used to wonder, how?
how will i survive when he is gone
i survive my love
despite the burden of your loss

life is good and filled with hope
our family grows and newborn eyes
speak to me of knowing you
as i hold them close and breathe in heaven

i miss the sound of your step
quick, with military precision
i miss your feeble jokes and bran muffins
the rose you would bring with my morning coffee

i miss the feel of your skin
the strength of your arms
your ability to make anything and everything right
i miss you manfred oellermann



Copyright © 2012 by Eryll Oellermann

Friday, 5 October 2012

remember to breathe

i forgot to breathe this morning, didn't even notice until i heard my body wheezing wildly in an attempt to take in air. let's face it, we are not our bodies. but ... our bodies still ache with our emotions. today i feel a lump in my chest that is wont to choke me on my own sadness. ten years tomorrow! ten years without him. i think 'they' are wrong when the say "time heals". time helps you to forget but the pain of loss is always there, waiting for a memory to spark and relight the all consuming flame of loss.